Author: Osemhen

Blessed Are The Merciful: Shelter the Homeless

Published by Osemhen

When I count my blessings, having a roof over my head comes in the top 5. I never take it for granted because at a point in my childhood, we were almost homeless. Our landlord decided he wanted to demolish our home and build a block of flats instead. We got a quit notice. We started building a house someplace else but were unable to finish it before our eviction deadline. We moved into the new house literally in the middle of construction. That was an interesting experience. 🙂 We had a happy ending. Not everyone is this lucky. I’m thinking of the Internally Displaced Persons who have fled their homes and livelihoods in the North because of Boko Haram. I’m thinking of unemployed young people in Lagos who sleep under bridges, in buses, in doorways. I’m thinking of the beggars on our streets. I’m thinking of the ones we call “mad” who really are just homeless people rendered anti-social by the way we treat them. “Be merciful as your heavenly Father is merciful.” We …

Blessed Are The Merciful: Clothing the Naked

Published by Osemhen

“…I was naked and you clothed me.” Matthew 25: 35-36 I wonder what I should write about this. It seems easy enough, doesn’t it? “Clothe the naked”. We should spring-clean our closets and give to the poor all the clothes we no longer want. The problem is that I hardly ever do this with a proper Christian attitude, with what some of my friends would call “rectitude of intention”. The clothes I give out are usually over-size or too tight or faded/worn or out of fashion. Cleaning out my closet is then less of a sacrifice, and more of a necessity. Yay. Free space in closet. Done good deed for the month. Gotten moral justification. Must shop. I don’t know. I think I could do better. I think God would want me to do better. Clothing serves two purposes. Protection from the elements and preservation of dignity. The last point is key because it also highlights something we often overlook: the origin of some of the clothes we wear. Behind many major clothing labels are sweatshops, in …

We Should All Be Mad

Published by Osemhen

What are you mad about? When I was younger, I was taught/told that all I had to do was get good marks, pass my exams and graduate with a good degree. I’d have a job, and with it financial security and independence. The lines would fall in all the right places. And they did. For some people. Some are lucky to have jobs when they graduate. But for the majority, there are no jobs. Not because they’re unqualified, not because they’re incompetent. No. Sheer (bad?) luck. A tragic game of musical chairs and I am mad, so mad that my family and friends are unemployed or underemployed and there doesn’t seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel. What are you mad about? My friend’s mother died earlier this year because she couldn’t get emergency dialysis done in the middle of the night. Another friend slumped while jogging. Government hospitals ask expectant mothers to come for delivery with candles, diesel, rechargeable flash lights. Women die in childbirth of the most routine causes. Babies …

The Woman You Married

Published by Osemhen

Look. Look at her, the woman you married. Look at her dozing as she nurses your child, make-up still on her face, one shoe off. Look at her doing the last of the dishes in the evening, still in her work clothes. Look at her as she patiently spoons rice into your toddler’s mouth, barely flinching as the child spills yet another cupful of water on the floor. Look at her. Look at her “adulting”. Trying to adult. Trying to be her mother, and her aunts, and her grandmothers. Trying to do it all, like she’s seen them do it all. Wear lace, walk in heels, attend weddings, go to the market, manage the domestic staff, do the last load of laundry. Can you tell we’re actually just little girls playing dress-up in our mothers’ lives? Look at her, smiling gamely as the baby places hands sticky with drool on her face. Look at her teaching your daughter to lace her shoes. Look at her, sighing with disgust at the fact that her jeans no longer …

Blessed Are The Merciful: Difficult Conversations

Published by Osemhen

Thank you, guys, for sticking around despite my inconsistent blogging. 🙂 How’ve you been? I’ve missed this. Anyways, I’m so behind on my posting schedule for the Works of Mercy series. I was wondering how I’d even catch up but then I realized that a number of them have the same themes. 😀 (No, it’s not cheating.) St. Paul is one of my favorite saints. His conversion story reminds me of God’s infinite mercy. How else could one man go from being a terrorist (think Isis-type of religious persecution of Christians) to being one of Christianity’s biggest proponents? Seriously. But in all the drama of Paul’s life there’s a character who’s sometimes forgotten. Ananias of Damascus. The believer through whom Paul’s sight was restored. The one who gave him his first instruction and then baptized him. This month, I’m focusing on the first 3 Spiritual Works of Mercy. To counsel the doubtful Teach the ignorant Admonish sinners All of us know dozens of “ignorant” people we would just love to “instruct” i.e. Tell how to …

The Art of Balance: Creativity and Your Day-Job

Published by Osemhen

My friend, Ozoz, is a phenomenon. She’s a geologist, a blogger, a recipe creator, a “traveller by plate”, a photographer and a cook. She’s also a mom. She’s given a TedTalk, appeared on TV a few times, held a photography exhibition and recently collaborated on #TechmeetsArtng. I, on the other hand, struggle with staying awake long enough to update my blog. Forget work-life balance. I’m not even sure what that is. I think about this often: how to balance my day-job with my creative life, my social obligations, my family life, my spiritual life …and a need to sleep. Sleep is winning, I must admit. Someone commented once that she’s not sure how I do everything. The truth is, I don’t. Some days, I should be writing and I just want to bake chocolate chip cookies instead. So I bake the cookies and eat them as I mindlessly scroll through Pinterest and Twitter. I console myself with this TedTalk by Nigel Marsh. I’ve listed it in my post on the 5 TedTalks Every Young Professional …

Food Hacks: For the Love of Moin-Moin

Published by Osemhen

I wish I could say I was adapting to motherhood. But it’s not exactly true, is it? Motherhood doesn’t give room for “adaptation”. It seizes its share of your life, your time, your space. And I could go on and on about how it’s a good kind of “baby takeover” or conversely, how important I think it is to maintain one’s autonomy in the face of a baby’s subtle manipulation (lol!) but this is not that kind of post. No, it’s not. I want to talk about food instead. Specifically, I want to talk about moi-moi. If Nigerians were into superfoods and all what not, moi-moi would be a superfood. It ticks all the right boxes. High-protein (especially when filled with fish), check. Bulky enough to be filling, check. Nutty umami-ness, check. I love moi-moi. I’m not so crazy about all the work required to make it. These days, though, I’m making it once a week. Thanks to two hacks I discovered about roughly the same time. The first is bean flour. No, not the …

Nigerian Blogs I Love: Ihunda’s Musings

Published by Osemhen

One of my blog resolutions is to share bloggers I love with my readers. I think it’s important for you to know there are so many good bloggers out there. I don’t remember exactly when I started following Afoma’s blog and Instagram feed. Right now, it feels like a long time ago. What delights me about her photographs? The colors, maybe. The charm she captures…the details. Her mindfulness (something I’ve been working on forever). We share a fondness for H&M blouses. And I must admit to a slight envy. Of her talent with the camera and the fact that she goes to school on a beautiful island. And yes, she’s a student. A medical student. How cool is that? Describe your blog with five words. Personal. Inspiring. Delightful. Happy place. Why did you start your blog? I was in dire need of self-expression. I was 16 and tired of talking to myself constantly (which I still do). I somehow caught the oversharing bug before I even knew it was a thing. If you look back …

Things To Give Up This Lent: A List of Ideas

Published by Osemhen

We interrupt our regular “Blessed Are The Merciful” series to bring you this Lenten edition. 😀 So Lent begins officially on Wednesday. That’s tomorrow. Traditionally, these 40 days before Easter are dedicated to fasting, alms giving and prayer. The model is Christ’s example; he spent 40 days in the wilderness fasting and praying. Most people remember the fasting; not everyone remembers giving alms and using the season to deepen our prayer life. And when we say fasting, people automatically think of food. Then there are all the various modes of fasting as practiced by the various denominations. 6am to 6pm fasting, one-large-meal per day fasting, dry fasting (no liquids, no food), one normal-sized meal per day and liquids (Milo, Lucozade etc.) to supplement… I could go on. For clarity, these are the rules for fasting in the Catholic Church: Ash Wednesday and Good Friday are prescribed days of fasting and abstinence (from the flesh of all animals except fish) for Catholics between the ages of 18 and 59. The ill, pregnant and nursing mothers …

My Natural Hair Regime: Daily, Weekly, Monthly

Published by Osemhen

I’ve been asked many times about a simple weekly regimen for natural hair care. So I’m going to share what works for me. I’m pretty lazy about my hair, I’m not always faithful to this regimen, I’m not an expert and if your hair is different from mine, your results might be different. That said, here goes. Taking care of natural hair involves balancing the protein and moisture needs of your hair. Experience usually teaches you whether your hair needs more protein or moisture. Mine needs more moisture. Daily Routine Fill a spray bottle with one table spoon of vegetable glycerin, two tablespoons of any oil of your choice (olive, coconut, jojoba etc.) and top up with water. Shake well and spritz your hair. If your hair is short enough, you can comb it. If not, just use your fingers to detangle it. Fun fact: nobody expects natural hair to be sleek and smooth. Don’t stress yourself. Style your hair. Sleep with a scarf on. It’ll preserve your hairstyle and protect your hair from drying …